2016-01-20: Second Chances

I'm not averse 

To second chances

Breathing new life 

Into old romances 

But not at the cost

Of repeating mistakes

That open old wounds

and make my heart ache

2016-04-21: One and only

You said I was

Your One and Only

Always and forever

Growing old together.

You said I was

The one you wanted

Cared for, cherished, 

Chose to be with.

You said you would be

Open, honest,

And be there

When I needed you.

You said we should

Put the past behind us

Build a life, a future.

I believed you.

If that's all true

I have to wonder

Why you're not here,

Not now, not ever.

2016-01-01: Dare to dream

For a while I dared to dream

But the dream you made for me

You also broke.

And I awoke inside

A shattered mirror

Reflecting only my lost hope.

2015-02-24: Don't Call Me

Don't call me baby
I am not your child,
I have my own life,
I have my own mind.

Don’t call me duck
Or bird, or hen
Wherever you come from
I’m no feathered friend.

I have a name
So use it
And if you can’t
Don’t call me

2006-12-13: Traveller

Sat on a train

going nowhere.

Sounds like the story

of my life.

A perpetual traveller

who never quite arrives.

[I've been kicking myself for not writing about anything other than emotions (seriously, how old I am ? And me with a Significant Milestone Birthday now less than a year away !). In addition I've been struggling to find time to work on or finish the fragments I do have. So I took a notebook along when I knew I might be sitting in a waiting room for some time. And came across this from 2006.....]

2015-02-01: Unfinished business

"Why didn't we...." 

You ask in a drunken call

I didn't hear regret

Just curiosity.

I don't remember

The question

Being asked,

Or anyone saying no.

Why didn't we

Ever steal a kiss

When we had

Too much to drink.

Why didn't we

Run naked into the sea

Just you and me

Against the world.

Why didn't we

Fall laughing into bed

And get to know each other

In an entirely different way.

Do we have unfinished business,

you and I ?

Or did the opportunity

Simply pass by.

And in hindsight

Is it simply that

The memory of maybe

Is sweeter than regret

[So this one has been in progress for a while, and recent things in my life have meant I haven't had the time to work on it. But the gap has also helped me rethink it slightly so I'm hoping it works in it's current form. It is based on a number of different events and conversations, some of which did involve me, and others I simply observed]

30/12/24: just found some of the notes for this one, and I'm not sure why I didn't include the following verse before the "do we have...." verse.

Why didn't we

Lay back in the long grass

When the sun wasn't the only thing
Getting hot

1989-10-16: Changeling

In my dream

I am everything you want me to be,
And somehow that seems right,
To not be fettered by reality
But instead be the figment
Of someone else's imagination.

And I, some kind of changeling,
Chained to solid earth
By feet and heart of stone,
Am liberated to unseen heights
By the transforming power
That fantasy can hold.

And yet how can it be
That I do this not for myself
But for some other who has yet to come
And thus in every moment
Within the dream
I live a lie.